Thursday, May 20, 2010

Anxiety Food

Oh jeez, why oh why am I getting a big red spot on my face right now?
How come suddenly none of my pants fit?
Where did I put that alarm clock?
Is the pen with the journal?
What if I forget something?
What have I already forgotten?
What if he's getting a cold and it doesn't sink in until we get on the plane?
What if I get really sick on the plane again?
What if the trip sucks?
What if the weather sucks?
What if the food sucks?
What if I can't read the menu?
What if I can read the menu but get it wrong anyway?
What if they figure out I'm awful at telling time?
What if they think I'm fat?
What if he thinks I'm stupid?
What if we get lost?
What if we get hurt?
Where is the nearest pharmacy?
Where does the train pick us up?
What if we oversleep?
When does the front desk close?
Where is the nearest internet terminal?
How do the phones work?
How does the toilet work?
How will my charger work?
How do the restaurants work?
How does the exchange rate work?
Will I get off the plane at the right location?
Is it even possible anymore to get on the wrong plane?
Will I remember my ID and my tickets?
Will I be dressed casually enough?
Will I be dressed warm enough?
Will I be dressed too warm?
Will I be dressed too casually?
Will I be able to meet anyone who isn't out to embarrass and defraud me?
Will I remember to bring back the right kind of goodies for the right number of people?
Will I remember enough of the language to get by?
Will my new shoes get ruined?
Will his new bag work out right?
Will the stuff we bring be confiscated by TSA?
Will he be able to understand anything?
Does my bag make me look like an idiot?
Does he even care about any of those sights?
Does he remember any of what we've talked about?
What if it's boring?
What if we did it wrong?
What if it goes all wrong?
When will it go totally wrong?
What am I going to do to singlehandedly make this whole thing go completely pearshaped?
What is that one, singular, ME-specific event that I'm going to do to throw this whole thing into the "beshitted nightmare of an experience" category?
... and how do I stop it, stop it, stop it now? Right Goddamn Now?


Oh look. Travelfever has kicked in. For realz.

1 comment:

PBC said...

Yikes. That's kind of how I feel about everything this week. Not the specifics, just the feeling. BTW, you CAN still get on the wrong plane. It almost happened to someone on my plane on the way to my Mom's a couple of weeks ago....